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19 August 2005 @ 01:54 am
blind man's bluff  
today the funniest thing in the whole wide world happened to me and shuqi (this sentence's ungrammatical 'cos it's my journal (and i'll cry if i want to) and "me" is definitely more important than "shuqi"!). we were at the place across the road of the somerset train station, opposite specialist shopping centre, in front of that whole row of that, you know, pubby/bar-ry area, when we saw this guy in dark glasses, cane in hand, trying to find his way around. when i first set eyes on him, he'd just almost bumped into a lamppost or something, and clearly, nobody really looked like they were gonna go up and help him.

first thought that entered my head--this guy's got a stick... how come he's using it so badly until he didn't even know there was an obstacle in his way? me and shuqi exchanged glances and for a moment seemed to debate within ourselves whether or not we ought to go up to him or something. as i stood beside him, his side profile facing me, i looked through the side of his dark glasses to see some tape-like stuff, well, taped over his eyes.

next thought that entered my head--this looks fake. first he doesn't know how to use the cane, next he's got tape over his eyes... finally, he's too cute for it to be real. the immediate thought after that--must be the newpaper team liao lah! shucks, now they've got cameras all over and i don't wanna be caught on paper staring at him and then walking away. this one confirm must help! so we approached him. turns out he wanted to get to plaza singapura and he was pretty nervous and kept on asking us where he was. (actually when we first approached him (okay, we were pretty awkward and giggly), he looked like he was fighting to stop himself from laughing or something.) then as shuqi was busy talking to him, i suddenly noticed something really, really weird--what i'd previously thought was his cane was actually............

one of those mopsticks everybody has at home!!! (you know, the type you can unscrew the mophead off? like one of those your mum uses to hang up those bamboo poles indoors?) i was so stunned that i shot off, "huh? how come you're using a..." before i managed to stop myself. i was thinking, what happens if he's really blind and he just, well, you know, didn't have the money to get a proper cane? so i shut up, and we proceeded to try and guide him to the nearest bus-stop (only a few hundred metres away) to take a bus to get him to plaza sing.

because he's... well, he couldn't see, we couldn't really just direct him with our voices 'cos he looked really, really unsteady going around like that with that... what you can mian qiang call a cane. holding him by the arm would be kinda funny, so i just stuck my little finger into his hand and kinda pulled him along. and i think we really looked a comical sight, the three of us, and being the horrible insensitive me, i just couldn't help keep trying hard to suppress those giggles bubbling up inside of me. we were all three just being pretty awkward and wanting to laugh a bit but not really laughing 'cos we were all just stifling it. he kept on thinking we were talking to him when shuqi and i were talking to each other, and when shuqi asked me if i wanted to eat the sausage i had in my hand, he said, "err, i think that'd be nice of you all lah." which was like darn awkward and amusing lah, 'cos he obviously thought we said something else.

finally we were like steps away from the bus-stop and shuqi had gone up ahead to check the bus route when he asked me, "so, can i ask you, what was your first impression when you saw me?" to which, i'd reached my limit... i just stopped there and guffawed out loud. then i said, "seriously, when i first saw you, i thought, this one confirm fake one." when he asked why, i told him everything and when i reached the part about his "cane", i just couldn't stop laughing... so basically we were just standing there and i was laughing and laughing and laughing and laughing away like a mad dog! and it was one of those types of grab-your-stomach-want-desperately-to-roll-all-over-the-floor-start-to-tear-very-badly uncontrollable unstoppable unfinishable laughs... for those who know, it's like when we laugh about the atc camp oic's burning head type of laughing lah. so you can tell it was really very bad, 'cos everybody around us must have been staring and wondering why we so bad laugh at the poor blind guy.

then he, rather abashedly (but of course also laughingly), explained that he'd gone to scout for a cane but it was way too ex for him to afford. he said that he was ngee ann poly and doing a project on events planning or management or something, and that they needed a feel of how the blind feel on the streets. he'd started off his "hike" at cineleisure. i couldn't help but keep bursting into hysterics... but not my fault leh! i mean, who in the world goes out blind with a mopstick as a cane??!? (and with the screw side tapping the ground.) it's really something worth laughing your guts out lah! (but shuqi really managed much better than i did... she didn't seem so overcome by the hysterics as i was. but then again, she didn't even notice the mopstick (!!) and she'd thought the tape over his eyes was from a recent surgery or something... which really was very nice of her to think so, 'cos i'd immediately thought it was a joke.) (or maybe i'm only saying this 'cos shuqi, i know you're reading! WAHAHAHA!!! that reminds me of the time when weiying and i told her she could get a free hi-card for getting top score playing snake on nokia mobiles.)

somemore, when his bus finally came and we were trying to help him up the bus, he was very bu zi liang li and before he'd even had one hand on the side of the bus to steady himself (before we could guide him to do that), he'd tried to take one large step onto the bus. but of course, there wasn't a step in front of him. he didn't fall or anything; eventually, i put his hand on the bus so he could get up. but seeing him do that so inexperiencedly, all the time knowing it was fake, was really super duper comical!!! somehow, relating it here doesn't seem all that amusing as it was when it happened... i just wish everyone was there to witness the entire gao xiao episode!

anyway, it ended with him boarding the bus and us saying bye-bye and him having to go back to the unfamiliar dark world of people who (supposedly) don't know he isn't really blind. it really made my dreary boring schoolday so much more exciting and interesting!


p.s.: i must also confess that if he hadn't had his eyes all taped up and i weren't so sure he couldn't see me at all, i wouldn't really have dared laugh so hysterically for so long and said all the ridiculous things i did to him. really, i think it was the, sort of, anonymity that emboldened me. haha.
 
 
Mood: giggly
Music: ai ni duo ni -- daniel chan
 
 
 
a little less than the girl next doorin_transit on August 20th, 2005 07:28 am (UTC)
phonology stuff
since you all have spoilt me to the point that i'm not very used to not receiving comments, i'm gonna say something pseudo-intelligent here. haha. you know why "emboldened" is "emboldened" and not "enboldened"?

because both the "m" and the "b" sounds are made using your lips (technically, they call this "labial"), while "n" isn't. but both "m" and "n" are nasal sounds. so since originally, it ought to be "enboldened", but to produce that word requires more effort than producing "emboldened", people say "emboldened" rather than "enboldened".

it's called "whatever requires minimal effort". isn't that ingenious?
(Anonymous) on August 20th, 2005 05:06 pm (UTC)
Re: phonology stuff
HAhaha... So u actually gotta post a comment to generate discussion ah...

Yes, yes... all the labial n nasal sounds... all the 'b' & 'p', 'd' & 't', 'v' & 'f'... Gonna do transcription again this sem.. GONNA B FUN! YAH rite... juz hope the marks will b equally good...
a little less than the girl next doorin_transit on August 21st, 2005 07:57 am (UTC)
Re: phonology stuff
haha nono it's just that i comment on my own entry 'cos nobody else interested in doing so. HAHA. don't you know interest (generally) generates good grades? spend more time with me then you'll do fantastically well for transcription this sem. hehe.
the doobfemdog on August 21st, 2005 06:36 pm (UTC)
actually it doesn't really seem that funny, i mean if it was me i would have ignored the guy... but you wrote so much and so enthusiastically that you forced me to laugh out loud into the comp screen. hahaha.
(Anonymous) on August 22nd, 2005 03:48 pm (UTC)
haha eh thanks a lot for being so fu yan leh. that's why i like you mah. *pat pat* i even exercise control over you through the internet by forcing you to laugh over some entry i wrote only available via cyberspace. am i a genius or what?
a little less than the girl next doorin_transit on August 22nd, 2005 03:50 pm (UTC)
that was me. forgot to sign in.
a little less than the girl next doorin_transit on August 22nd, 2005 03:52 pm (UTC)
swear i wasn't trying to jack up the number of comments! (HAHA i didn't actually occur to me at first, but now that it has......)
a little less than the girl next doorin_transit on August 22nd, 2005 03:53 pm (UTC)
typo. i meant IT didn't actually occur to me at first... swear it was a typo. MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA (but it really was a typo!)
the doobfemdog on August 22nd, 2005 05:51 pm (UTC)
madness! you are a comment-hungry freak genius!
a little less than the girl next doorin_transit on August 23rd, 2005 01:17 pm (UTC)
i didn't exactly do it on purpose lor
the doobfemdog on August 22nd, 2005 05:50 pm (UTC)
yes you are.
master, your wish is my command.
a little less than the girl next doorin_transit on August 23rd, 2005 01:17 pm (UTC)
so you're saying that i'm a genius while you're a genie?? bwahahaha...
the doobfemdog on August 24th, 2005 06:35 am (UTC)
no i'm just saying that when i said you're a genius, i didn't say it out of my own will.

but genie + genius does sound like a great partnership. haha.