so i ended up sitting down in front of the toiletbowl, cradling my head. and it did make my head feel a little little bit better. unfortunately, i had already puked like six times and was ready to die liao. the things that went through my (swirly) head... (1) must have been the half-pot of cold green bean i took right before i went to sleep. (2) i didn't work on the comp for extended hours in the dark so it couldn't be that. (3) could it have been syntax and/or thai construction worries? (4) the grandaunt? (can't be, she left only not long ago.) (5) did i do anything absolutely evil and/or wrong to deserve immediate punishment recently? (couldn't think of any.) (6) i don't want to die--i haven't handed in my homework i spent hours on, i haven't got comments back on my research proposal, etc. yet, and i have a thai class to attend at noon!
anyway, everything that i puked out was green bean, since i hardly ate anything else the day before. it was even coming out of my nose. i definitely couldn't make it to school. and didn't wanna hafta puke on public transport either. what was worse, the doctor wasn't even open yet. close to nine, i practically crawled my way to the doc's with my dad and yati. she gave me a jab in the butt. (first time since maybe when i was a baby!) and came to the conclusion about some gastric flu thingy. and gave me an mc. it's a good thing my only class today was thai, and it's my free day tomorrow, and my group members kindly postponed our meeting this morning to friday. it's a strange thing 'cos i was thinking, it seems, sickness only happens when you most don't want and/or can't afford for it to happen. i didn't wanna miss school today. i had things to do--i had to collect my library book, get readings from a friend, hand in my work and attend a very competitive class! how come when i can better afford to skip school, this doesn't happen?
so, just like the ate-too-many-eggs-kena-indigestion experience in jc2, i think i shall be staying away from green bean for a while. i think i always have problems with food. overeating and stuff. i can [not eat] and be not hungry for the longest times. i can eat excessively at one go. and i can eat continually throughout the day. don't know why. sigh. it's not really the hurling part that kills me (though that is horrible as well). but the swirly headache part is by far the worst. i absolutely hate headaches. and i couldn't determine if it was the headache that was causing the puking, or the puking that was inducing the headache. i briefly wondered how it would be like if i were to have to go through this everyday, like chemo patients (in my imagination). and came to the immediate conclusion that it would probably be better off dying. i can hardly begin to describe the misery i went through this morning.
the medicine took its effect and i slept from close to ten 'til four-plus. i currently still have that swirly headache, but it feels much better now and i'm not puking anymore. which means i'm also no longer dehydrated. looks like i probably won't be dying anytime soon. by the way, the doctor has this weird instruction that i should take two mouthfuls of soft food each time and then rest. this sickness to me seems a little hilarious... but it did make me think a little on my own mortality. (just like isaiah said he did when he was lying on the hospital bed, femdog, if you remember.) now i've officially missed one of every module's lessons excepting syntax. but i guess i probably shouldn't keep thinking of school. oh well, God speed my recovery and help me give my best in whatever i do. amen.